“Pull me back up, Jack! Pull me back up, and I swear I will lose the weight you’ve been grousing about! Please, honey? Don’t let me fall into the water!”
Jack, now mad and scared, admonished, “Why’d you jump when the truck honked at us? You afraid they might see us doing something stupid?”
Gwen was crying and pleading as she explained, “Jack, the horn startled me, and I lost my footing! Please pull me up, dammit! My arm is hurting, and yours must be too!”
Jack shot back with annoyance. “I could lift you, if I had both of my hands. My other hand is holding me here so I don’t follow you into the drink! If I just had a lighter female to heft up or I had superhuman strength, this would be all over!
“Say, wait a minute! An adrenaline rush! That’s what I need! Say something to make me mad! Make me mad enough to heft you up!”
From her depths, Gwen summoned the most aggravating taunt she could think of and shouted, “Your brother’s cock is bigger than yours!”
Jack roared, “I said mad, not insane! You want me to heft you or let you go? Oh brother, this is hopeless! Wait a minute …”
Jack felt his fruit phone vibrate and announced, “Gwen, my phone! Of course! I can use my phone to get help! It just texted me!”
Gwen’s voice reached an epic pitch as she insisted, “This is not the time or place to be texting your friends! Pull me up, Jack!”
Jack responded, “No, don’t you see? I will lean into the rail, then with my free hand I can dial 911! You know, police, rescue, TV cameras, and then of course, talk shows!”
Jack freed up his fruit phone and punched in the save code while he focused his strength to hold onto Gwen. At least he had a good hold on her, though he was getting tired as his arm strained further and further.
The connection was completed when a female voice on the other end of the call responded, “911, what’s your emergency?”
Jack could almost see light at the end of the tunnel and barked, “We’re here on this bridge, and my girlfriend has fallen over the edge! I’m holding onto her hand, but I can’t hold her much longer! Please send emergency help to this location!”
The 911 operator responded, “Sir, this emergency service is here in the United States. Your geo-location from our emergency services database shows you calling from Poland.
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