Quip quickly added, “Now understand, this could be a false lead that is designed to alert the extortionists that we are hunting them. Whoever you send in, they had better be extra stealthy and sleuthy. Otherwise, in ICABOD speak, the culprits will say cheese it boys, da coppers are here!”
Julie’s look of disbelief basically communicated all of her feelings. But she dutifully stated, “I’m not sure that I believe that your nearly self-aware, nearly self-actualized fully artificial intelligent supercomputer would step out of a 1950’s gangster movie to offer that line on open mic.”
Before anyone could comment further, ICABOD stated, “Thank you, Madam Julie, for defending my communication integrity from such a ghastly, low rent gangster line. Dr. Quip has been picking on me again by carelessly attributing rough and gutsy film noir lines to my speech patterns. It is refreshing to have a calm and refined professional defend my sensibilities.”
Wolfgang was chuckling as Quip quickly shot a look of protest between ICABOD and Julie and then blurted out, “Well, he could have! It’s not so hard to believe! He is not the squeaky-clean, high moral ground supercomputer oozing with integrity that he claims to be! Why, the other day I caught him cheating at the crossword puzzle in the newspaper!”
Julie began speaking to ICABOD as if Quip didn’t exist, and in a sultry tone offered, “You know, ICABOD, those flashy-lighty sequence things you do when you’re processing are …well, seductively enticing. Did you mean it that we could do a night out thing with dinner when I get back into town and maybe exchange binaries, hmmm?”
ICABOD now also continued as though Quip wasn’t there as he responded, “I enjoy going to all the gin-joints in all the town with a dolled up piece of sculpture like you, babe. With a dame like you on my arm, I gets looks of anger, ‘cause you is my squeeze! But, they don’t pull nothing ‘cause they can see my heater bulging under my top coat! They don’t wanna turn out like old lefty Louie they found floating with yesterday’s unclaimed fish. Pick me up at the usual time, doll! I’ll be waiting for youse. Wear da black hat with dat low cut black dress I met you in.”
Julie smiled like ICABOD was the one. Quip was on the verge of a coronary but could no longer speak because of the mock 1950’s gangster verbiage exchange between ICABOD and Julie. Wolfgang struggled to control his fits of laughter and decided the call needed to end.
Click Follow to receive emails when this author adds content on Bublish