One night we're talking about good/bad parts of the job. Rory and Fowler have never worked in the parking lot, so I tilt my chair back and describe my favorite job to them.
“When people are leaving the park they can wait in line for a parking lot tram or just walk on out to the parking lot. Since the path to the parking lot runs right next to the parked trams, people try to slip through the railings from the path and onto the tram, bypassing the waiting line.
To stop this, one guy is designated to watch for people trying this and make them get off the tram and back on the pathway. I love the job.
“What management wants is for the guard to constantly watch the pathway so that anybody thinking about slipping through sees the guard looking and just keeps walking. That's boring, I need a little more drama in my work, so I have my own method.
“My strategy is to deliberately look away, look at my feet, speak to other maggots, anything so it looks like I'm not watching. Then some maggots slip through the rails and I say, in a very loud voice, 'Sir, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to get back on the path or go to the rear of the line.' Everybody around can hear me and see them climb back to the path, embarrassed at being caught.
“I love the job. I don't get to do it often enough.”
“You're cruel, you know that, don't you?” says Rory.
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