The nightly terror is real. And so are the words...
Shhhh ... this is our little secret ... don t tell anyone.
On the outside, Lori Golden had a perfect childhood. A perfect family. A perfect upbringing. What Lori really had was a perfect house of lies. To the outside ... and within the confines of the walls.
The sexual abuse that started at the age of five for Lori Golden became a wall of silent screams. Screams that were hidden from herself and from the world for decades. Until she could do and did the tell.
When sexual abuse occurs, you are alone with your abuser, creating a unique kind of aloneness. One that is dark and sinister. You feel hopeless in the belief that you could get better, or the pain could end. Your aloneness becomes so profound that it makes you want to self-destruct, even feel suicidal.
You should embrace your story and let your inner abused child speak out. Learn how to love your child within and dedicate yourself to achieving your own personal freedom from its bondage. You lived through the worst of it as a child and survived. You can live freely once again.
Lori Golden learned that life is possible after a decade of sexual abuse. Her story ... her recovery ... and now her work as a therapist and speaker has opened doors for thousands.
In my recovery from Incest I remembered how often I went round and round in my head thinking...Could he have just done what he did? Back and forth in an endless cycle of trying to figure out what was real and unreal. I got away from what I was feeling in the moment, the sensations in my body. In adulthood I continued to go back and forth in my head thinking should I or shouldn't I feel a certain way, or Is this real or not real, Is this ok or is this not ok. An endless cycle leading to absolute confusion and an inability to trust myself.
My House of Lies: Awakening from a Childhood of Sexual Abuse
I left my body where I was feeling, went up into my head to figure out if this was real or not real while it was taking place. I kept asking myself, he couldn’t have just done this, could he? So, I thought I had imagined it. This was one of my early memories of when a dissociation occurred. Trying to figure out what is real and what is unreal, getting lost in my thinking in order to leave the sensations of my body where it was taking place, feeling thoroughly confused and not trusting myself. When it was over, I didn’t have a clue what I felt or thought.