In all the years I’ve been helping couples learn to communicate with each other, I’m always amazed at how many of them are frustrated because they can never finish a simple conversation together. In fact, many of them tell me that all conversations end in confusing arguments that only go around in circles.
It doesn’t have to be that way. I am sad that so many relationships end in disaster because couples just don’t know how to get out of the Circular-Argument trap.
If you want to learn to avoid this trap, use these three simple methods to sidestep this challenge. Your conversations really can end with the feeling of completion instead of with an argument.
You may not end up in agreement but at least you will understand each other’s positions.
Wash, rinse and repeat as necessary.
Some of the couples I’ve worked with find that they’re so addicted to this pattern that it’s necessary to come back to the original question several times before it is answered.
It sounds simple, and it is. But it may not be easy.
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