I’ve always believed in what I can see, what I can hear and what I can touch. Surfing was my religion and destiny was just a fairy-tale. But one summer, over ten days during the hottest February on record, all that changed. I found hope – the kind of hope that sustains you, even when you don’t want to be sustained.
I remember hearing this expression years ago, and it stuck with me. "She haunted my dreams."
It struck me as sad, in a soul-deep kind of way. Not "She haunted my nightmares", as you would expect. It was bittersweet, pain and grief tied up with hope and love. No way of separating the two. It seemed a perfect way to describe how much Emily's disappearance had affected Heath. He refuses to let go of the hope that she might still come back to him, even though inside, he suspects she might be gone forever. Hope, tied up with love. If he lets go of the hope, he's afraid the love would go with it, and he's not ready to stop loving her.
The Trouble With Paper Planes
She haunted my dreams. That made it sound romantic, like something out of a Bronte novel, but the truth was much less glamorous. I woke up in a cold sweat sometimes. I couldn’t breathe. I could see her face as clearly as if she were standing right in front of me. I tried to avoid the truth for a long time, because I was afraid. But I couldn’t avoid it anymore. I could feel it growing inside of me, gaining momentum.