Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference. Robert Frost, The Road Not Taken
For more than forty years, I chose limited beliefs, which locked me into feeling unworthy. Growing up as a poor farm boy, wearing second hand clothes in high school, I felt like the lowest of the low. Being shy and introverted my self-worth drug on the ground.
To complicate my low self-worth, I unconsciously choose to swallow some of my alcoholic father’s pain and shame and take it on as my own. Until about the age of thirty I felt like a social outcast, a broken-down bum like my father.
In school, I believed myself to be stupid. After six years of College and additional years of ongoing self-study of psychology and systems of self-development one day a realization hit me, I was smart. From then on I chose to believe in my intelligence and feel more confident.
For, however, another fifteen years I felt like an emotional retard in male-female relationships. Inside, I experienced anger, depression, and hurt. Yet, I felt too vulnerable to express my feelings and chose to numb myself in the false belief I won’t experience any more pain. Each failed codependent relationship reinforced the perception, which I chose to believe, of my incapability of expressing love.
Nevertheless throughout my life, even though I felt unworthy, I chose to follow the inner light of my intuitive guidance. Always I seized the highest action leading me into greater light. Through each relationship I chose to learn more about myself. After the age of forty-five my life purpose and creative gifts of energy healing, teaching self-development, and writing about spiritual subjects began manifesting.
Through the difficult emotional relationships and a spiritual dark night of the soul, I chose to follow the highest truth I knew at any particular time. Through these experiences I gained an inner sense of my own self-worth independent of other people’s perceptions.
It has taken over forty years of choosing to be healed emotionally and spiritual development to purify the pain of the past. Continuously, I chose the highest and came closer to the divine center within myself.
I have chosen to move out of the myth of my unworthiness into a creative, intelligent, intuitive, loving, and worthy being. In the words of Robert Frost, I chose the road less traveled by most and that has made all the difference.
Have you chosen the myth of unworthiness at times in your life? What have you done to dispel this myth? What do you chose to do now?
I talk next, from my own experience, about taking on other people’s pain in an unconscious desire to help them. This can be in regards to our birth families, in relationships, in the work place, and particularly as therapists or energy healers.
I still to some degree take on people’s pain when working with groups of people, conducting seminars, or doing energy sessions with clients. I use methods afterwards like conscious intention and Tibetan bells to clear myself and the healing room of energies that have been released. My wife, also an energy healer and ultra-sensitive, reminds me at times that I am carrying some group or an individual’s energy that I need to clear.
Click Follow to receive emails when this author adds content on Bublish