What should have happened?
Charlie (me!) meets Emma (a cool kitty) who is bored in her posh mansion. Charlie discreetly elopes with her after threatening the owners with a shotgun and insisting he’s taking her away whether they like it or not. Emma doesn’t have much of a penchant for war so Charlie grows bored with her. She does love Bovril though so Charlie sets her up in a factory making the stuff. She devotes the remainder of her years to working on the production line, entitled to one jar of Bovril for every 100 produced. When she dies from a Bovril overdose, Charlie has her buried in a giant jar of Bovril before returning to his archery practice.
Special instruction
Sell in all supermarkets, next to Bovril if possible, and rename Madam Bovril.
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