I was exhausted, and had just finished caning my last client’s bottom. I had done 3 sessions that day in my alter-ego as a professional Dominatrix. I was looking forward to an evening of relaxation, cuddling up on the sofa and watching the telly with my new partner, Mark.
Mark was also known as Suzanna, and we had met in a fetish club. But that’s another story, which I’ll tell you all about later.
Being a Dominatrix was never a life ambition for me. It was something I discovered when I was 23 years old, and it gave me an unbelievably varied and diverse range of experiences, as well as incredible insights into what makes people tick. They often say that the University of Life gives you the best degree possible. As I’ll tell you, thanks to being a Dominatrix, I now have a Ph D from the University of Life!
I had always been a shy person as a child, and I certainly did not exude a natural dominance. I attributed my present dominant persona to a combination of being influenced by a very controlling father, and also wanting to put control back into my life.
My home was in the middle-class suburbs of central England. From the outside I would be thought of as a ‘normal’ woman in her in 20s.
I loved shopping, shoes and going out. I lived in a nice safe area. I was well spoken and could be considered to be fairly comfortable in the life that I shared with my partner.
I was not a strong academic, and university was never an option. After leaving school, I worked in retail and hairdressing, but I craved something more interesting. So I embarked on a brief career in glamour and fetish modelling. But I got fed up with peeling off clothing, getting into more and more provocative poses, and working for some really chauvinistic photographers, whose every other word had ‘bullshit’ written all over it.
Not every photographer was like this, and some were OK. But the majority were doing it because they wanted to get a peek at my pussy and/or potentially a blow-job.
I began to realise this wasn't for me, and I felt it was making me have a very distorted view on men. I also found it hard to be subservient, and when I was asked to do videos, I had to speak in a sexually provocative way. I found that difficult, because, although I was physically attractive, ‘speaking sexy’ didn't come naturally at all.
Most of the photographers and directors were men. Sleazy ones at that. Although they say it is ‘just work’, it’s obvious that they enjoyed the control aspect of taking pictures of a pretty woman in seductive poses. It was the sort of world where it was very difficult to keep your boundaries. You were paid by the hour to the levels you worked. So to make more money, which everyone wanted, you had to stretch your levels, so you weren’t really in control at all. This meant doing things that you really didn’t want to do, just to earn some more money.
My first taste of Domination was when I visited a website called Strict Women (www.StrictWomen.com). It really opened my eyes, and I saw men in a different light.
Shortly after, I was offered the opportunity to do a fetish modelling shoot, and I was asked to spank a man's bottom.
I went to the shoot not knowing what to expect. But I found it was very laid back, and the shoot brought out my dominant side. It was a rôle-play based shoot, with me dressed up as the sexy schoolgirl, and having to spank the bottom of a man who had been a teacher who had behaved inappropriately.
I took him over my lap and used my hand on his bottom first. He was in his 40's, medium build, and had quite a flat bottom with skin that was still tight.
The video ran for about 20 minutes and ended up with me giving him six strokes of the cane. He was obviously a pro, as he didn't flinch much when I caned him.
My second experience of being a Dominatrix was when I worked with a Mistress and did a day of filming for her website.
I started private Dominatrix sessions shortly after, and haven't looked back since.
The sort of clients that I saw were very different from the people I worked with doing photo shoots.
In a video, the marks on the bottom of a spankee (the one who is being spanked) were a normal by-product, and were expected. In real life, many people had a family to go home to. Although some could be marked as their wife was fine with it, a lot couldn’t be. So you had to modify your techniques with different clients. Marks, by the way, are the ‘tramlines’ from the cane.
Some spankees had higher pain thresholds than others, so this was more varied than working in film when the most red-marked bottom would sell the video.
As a Mistress, I was asked to do all sorts of bizarre things. Most I could understand, but I found it difficult to understand some of the more extreme services that clients requested. The best example of this was ball-busting. I simply could not understand why a man would want to have his balls kicked. And kicked hard. I had always understood that, for a man, having his balls kicked, was one of the most painful things he could experience, and was to be avoided at all costs. But if one of my clients wanted me to do this, I would oblige, even though I found it impossible to comprehend.
To me, being a Dominatrix was a lifestyle, and totally normal. But to most people (‘vanilla’ people), it was not even understandable, and it was taboo.
I was highly aware I was leading a lifestyle outside what society classed as 'the norm'. It was certainly not something people discussed freely in public, and perhaps didn’t even discuss within the confines of a relationship. So perhaps what I did was performing a need in society, as some people wanted to submit to someone and they didn’t feel they could express that desire in their relationship It was viewed as too unconventional. But if there was not an outlet for a person to express this sort of thing, I think it could make things very boring for them, as they would miss out on all the fun experiences Domination has to offer.
I should point out to you that everything described in this book actually happened, and it is all factual. The only changes I’ve made are people’s descriptions, so that they cannot be identified by anyone. Apart from this, not a word I have written is fictitious – all the stories are based on real experiences that have happened to me. I hope you enjoy reading about them.
Click Follow to receive emails when this author adds content on Bublish