We don’t have to eat
No we don’t even sleep
Riding those waves
Is our only crave
It’s all about just one affection
…Midnight Thrill Ride
The apocalyptic landscape spread out before them. Through the headlights of the Kitty Mobile, silhouettes of the undead appeared and disappeared.
Road kill thrill.
On the roof above the passenger seat, a patchwork of ticks was scratched to mark the kill count.
Kitty scratched yet another mark. “One hundred fifty-seven.”
“He has to count for more than one. The guy must have weighed three hundred pounds.”
“No, Tom,” Kitty argued, “His weight is offset by his lack of intelligence. It’s a give and take.”
Billy the Bat turned his attention from the road to chime in. “How can you say that? The proportions are all wrong. The average human brain only weighs seven pounds…”
Screams rang out inside the van as a zombie appeared in the middle of the road. Billy turned around just in time to swerve out of the way and missed crashing into the swaying monster by mere inches. The van veered off the road to fly, head first, into a ditch. The engine chugged and wheezed then fell silent.
“Is everyone okay?” Tom’s whispered voice floated from the back of the van?
Silence.
“Hello?” Again, Tom called out.
Before anyone could answer, the sound of a small collection of zombies rang out.
“Fuck, this isn’t happening. Please tell me this isn’t happening.” Tom maneuvered his way through the band’s equipment, to the back window of the van.
“It’s definitely happening.”
Tom turned back to his band mates. “Rise and shine everyone. We have visitors.”
No one moved.
“Gang? Come on now, this is not the best time to be fucking around with me.”
Again…nothing. A bead of sweat broke out on Tom’s forehead.
“Kitty? You okay?”
Tom shot up to the front of the van and placed two fingers on her wrist. As soon as he felt a pulse he gently slapped Kitty’s cheeks. “Come on girl, wake up.”
“Wha-what happened? Is it show time already?”
“You could say that.” Tom punctuated the statement with another, softer slap to the cheek.
“Let me sleep just a little more. My voice needs the rest.”
And she was out.
“Shit.” Tom complained as he turned to Billy.
“Come on, Billy. I really need your help.”
Billy sat up as if yanked from slumber by a thousand volts.
“I swear to God it wasn’t me.” Billy looked around. “What’s going on?”
Tom grabbed Billy’s attention. “No time to explain. Just grab a weapon and get ready to kill.”
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