I am tired. I just want to rest. Resting isn’t allowed. Taking a break from life isn’t allowed. You are expected to move from one phase directly into the next, from one situation into the next without pause. Inaction is laziness. Inaction is unacceptable. Inaction is irresponsible. I hear all these words over and over in my head. I realize that silently people around me are whispering them about me.
The war raging within and without have taken such a toll on me physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually that I’ve no energy, no strength left. How can I find the courage to do what is right for me? I have never really been responsible to myself. But being responsible to myself now means I will be irresponsible in the eyes of others.
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