I’m getting older and I know I’m wise beyond my years,
Being a 14 year old and seeing the cold world for what it is.
I am at a place where I want to meet my biological mother,
I just don’t know how to tell my adopted parents that.
I sit here in my warm, cozy room in a beautiful home,
Thinking of the day I get to meet the woman I look like.
Days where I daydream about the beauty of my mother,
Knowing that she thinks of me all of the time.
Listening to music to escape this crazy world,
Writing this journalistic diary I call my wonderful life.
My mom comes in my room and we start talking about life,
I tell her that I want to meet my biological mother.
I tell her that I’m ready to know the other part of who I am,
I want to know the truth about the family who abandoned me.
It’s time that I hear the hate that my family has for my skin tone,
How I’m not one of them and if I’ve ever seen any of them in town.
My mom is surprised to know that I’m ready to meet my birth mother,
And she goes to get her laptop to give me her e-mail address.
I’m overcome with emotion as I’m finally going to communicate with her,
I’m about to reach out to the woman who sacrificed her life for me.
I copy my mom’s e-mail address to my e-mail contact list,
And I start to e-mail my mother but my mind is blank.
I start to shed tears realizing that this is a reality,
As I’m finally able to formulate words into sentences.
After I finish the email, I click send only to sit here in deep thought,
Wondering when she is going to read it, what she will think and say.
Sitting here in front of my laptop waiting for a response,
Hours go by as I’m trying to occupy myself with different things to do.
The next day I get a response email from my mom while I’m in school,
I wait until I’m home to read it and I get more emotional.
Reading words that are coming from the woman who carried me for 9 months,
Starting to realize that this is finally going to happen and she’s ready too.
A week goes by and my parents take me to another town to meet my mom,
Sitting in the car in anticipation, nervous, scared, my stomach is in knots.
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